Maybe the Hardest Thing to Manage Is Yourself
Humor me for a quick minute: take a brief scroll through social media, and notice what emotions are being asked of you.
You’ll probably notice some humor, a lot of outrage, sadness, joy, envy, positivity, competition—and probably some more outrage. And the posts that contain the most outrage are generally the ones that fuel the most conversation, sadly enough.
Outrage is easy. Shock is easy. Steadiness is not.
I tell all the candidates I talk to who are considering joining Forge and becoming a recruiter that the hardest part of this job is growing an internal resilience to everything that happens around you. This has never been more true than in today’s job market.
Literally, our entire job is about people—with all the ways they surprise and baffle you. We find that perfect fit after looking for months on end! Awesome! And the next hour, a client changes their mind on what they want or a candidate backs out of a job they accepted. Bam!
The ups and downs of this job (and of people) burn a lot of recruiters out. It just becomes too much.
The truth is, we are finite. You and I only have so much emotional energy to spend.
So what I tell my recruiters—and myself—is that my job is to manage my emotions and myself. Every situation does not get the gift of my full emotions. Because while the outrage is easy and might “feel good,” in reality, it will drain your tank faster than anything else.
While your job may not be about people, I would imagine that you also have a hundred different emotions elicited from you in one day (probably more if you’re on social media!).
There are many different ways to shape and mold our emotional responses to things—here are a few that work for me.
I cut down on what I’m consuming online. Instead, I pick up the phone and have real conversations with people I know and trust.
I work to stay in my own swim lane. It’s not my job to fix the problems of the whole world. The reality is, posting a comment about how bagels are sliced at XYZ company is not going to really do anything other than get me hot and bothered. Or… toasty.
Control what I can control, and let the rest be. I hold onto the truth that things are going to work out the way they should, and I need to do the next right thing.
These comments come from the trenches as someone who often wishes to be just a little less passionate, and I’ve often gotten feedback to that effect throughout my career. But what I’m noticing is that the more resilient and steady I become, the more I see the good around me. And that’s worth it, every time.
Here’s to working every day to become a more resilient, steady human being.