On Becoming Resilient
We spend a lot of our lives avoiding hard things.
And that’s understandable, because no one actually wants bad things to happen. But it’s also ironic, because the hard things are what help us grow.
In January of this year, I joined a new gym that was very weights-focused. Seeing as my previous workouts consisted of running, elliptical, and the occasional Les Mills class, hoisting weights in the air every day was . . . painful. No, let’s be real: I hurt EVERY SINGLE DAY and could barely walk at times.
But eventually, my body adjusted. I became stronger and while I am still sore, it’s nowhere near the previous level of agony.
What I’m learning is that the only way the hard things get easier is to just do the hard thing. Many times we think time makes hard things easier, but it’s really the leaning in and *doing* the hard things. Of learning new ways of thinking and being that make us better.
The same is true in business. There are so many things I encounter today that I have never done before or journeys I have not walked through. It is, simply put, hard.
But the biggest mistakes I have made are when I have avoided the hard things. It’s usually due to fear. Fear of consequences, of hurting someone’s feelings, or of saying or doing the wrong thing.
What I’m learning is that I will rarely be 100% sure on something. Poker players talk about risk in terms of percentage of certainty. “I am 80% sure that this is the right decision.”
And each time I face something unexpectedly hard and survive, I get stronger. And the next time I have to do “the hard thing,” it is progressively LESS hard.
We adapt and grow and change and learn by doing. And the hard things will not kill you, they will make you stronger.
So whatever hard thing you are facing today, you will be stronger and better for walking through it, but only when you actually lean in and do the hard thing.
You are probably tougher than you think.